The Beauty of the Season

Fall sports are coming to an end. Last night was bitter sweet as Tom and I walked Cody for the last time down the track to the field. It has rained for parents night for the past three years so why did we expect it to be any different last night? I ditched my umbrella and took Cody's arm as our names were announced. I was all teary eyed all day thinking about this, but when the time came I felt fortunate to be able to walk with Cody and his dad for one last recognition of all his hard work. Life of a parent (especially teenagers) can be challenging, but I wouldn't change it for the world. I think of how cute and fun they were as toddlers, how they have become independent young adults, and hope they have a bright and rewarding future.

Tom had his MRI last week and now I am checking in with his Doc at U of M to see the best method of getting the CD to their team. He has had more bad days lately as he is further in with his chemo. One of his greatest struggles is managing his pain, especially at night. If he takes his pain meds his mind races until the early morning hours, if he doesn't take it he is up with pain. He has tried to use a sleep aid which gives him nightmares. I am not sure which is better for him to deal with. I believe this contributes to his feeling fatigued during the day and can become a vicious cycle. He tries to keep up a good attitude and there are days that he pushes himself. However I do see him struggling a little more than he did 30 days ago.

For myself I have been told at work "Your a little quiet lately, is everything ok?" I admitted to Tom a couple of weeks ago that I am not dealing very well lately. Tom assured me that under my circumstances I am handling it very well. That is why I love this man....always my cheerleader! I find it interesting that when I am having my pity party days, someone says something that helps me to realize how blessed I really am. I truly believe it's all in ones perspective. I know that we are all allowed to have bad days and that it is a very human reaction, but I am glad that have not been stuck there. The past couple of days going to/from work I see the color on the trees and the beauty of this Earth and have to thank our creator for this world. Just like where I live we have season in life: some fill us with warmth and laughter other times we feel bare and cold. During each season we have life's lessons to learn, some we cherish and other we learn the hard way. I have decided to enjoy this season to the best of my ability.

Ecclesiastes 5:20 "To enjoy your work and to accept your lot in life - that is indeed a gift from God. The person who does that will not need to look back with sorrow on his past, for God gives him joy."