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Sunday, October 13, 2013

That's Life

Life if funny sometimes & sometimes it's not fun at all. Our U of M experiences has not been the highlight of this season. Tom was called with a quick schedule of his outpatient surgery (giving him 2 days to find a driver)with a simulation follow up the next week. Tom's good friend Chris said that he would be able to take him. I have to mention that early morning is not Tom's best part of the day. Since having the adjustable bed, his facial swelling and tightness in his throat has deminished, but that does not make him jump up and down in the am. Anyway, he was up and out the door by 5:30 Thursday morning to have his surgery. Upon his arrival he finds that they gave him the wrong date, and he is scheduled the following day. Luckily his friend was able to take him over 500 miles (there & back twice) so that he could have the surgery. So two days in a row he was up and out the door before 6 am. After surgery he had to rest on his back for 2 hours as it was cricitcal that his liver not move. Tom was not happy about this and the fact that on Friday was our Parents night to walk our son on the football field. Tom told me that he needed 2 days bed rest (not mentioned in our preplan meeting with the docs). I came home from work Friday to tell Cody that I would be the one walking him, he said "OK mom, I understand". As you all know Tom by now, he would not miss this opportunity for anything. He was standing by his boy, pure white and a little wobbly, but NOTHING was keeping him from this experience. Many of the parents mentioned they were glad to see him. They all got a laugh as I explained that he just had out patient surgery and is supposed to be bed ridden, but I don't believe anyone was surprised to see him.

During the following week Cody came home with the Athletic Trainer & coach who explained that Cody had taken a huge hit and they beleived he had a concussion. Cody felt dizzy and had a headache. A trip to the Doctors confirmed and he missed the next two weeks of football. The same day Tom had an aweful experience with his infusion and the Pharmacy filling his prescription. On Friday I went along with Tom for his doctor visit and Simulation. This time around we were treated as if this was his first radiation visit. The experience took only 1/2 the time once they realized that Tom was there last December. Once we got into the car Tom said "We never saw the doctor" which was the reason that I accompanied him. Oh well, we were both ready to head home!

They told Tom that they needed to create a program before they can start his radiation treatments and that it would take a least a week to get him scheduled. Radiation treatments will start this Tuesday and will be scheduled every Tues/Thurs for 5 treatments. Tom did ok with the breathing tube during the simulation his firefighter training with SCBA helped, but is not looking forward to having to go through it. While waiting to start his treatment he has been romping in the woods looking for that "big buck" to come along.

His strength has been diminishing along with his appetite. I try not to worry about how skinny he's become. I've tried different ideas and they are not working and I feel helpless. For the most part Tom has been content to just hang out at home. When I mention doing things he just doesn't have the will/energy to go like he used to. Katie, my parents & I went to Art Prize and had a beautiful warm day to walk around Grand Rapids and enjoy. Tom would rather hang out at home & watch football or Tigers. It's becoming clear to me that our life is changing once again & those days of being on the go all the time has gone.

I will be honest and say that I've had a hard time adjusting to this slower pace. Sometimes I feel down, but then I remember that I have so much to be thankful for: that Tom is here, that he has a good sense of humor, that he is so involved in his children's lives, that he is a fighter, and that he is still my biggest supporter through all of this. I am so lucky to have him in my life & to have been with him for over 1/2 my time on this earth. We are doing a series a church about Unbinding Your Heart. One of the questions is How is your life different as a Christian? For me it has a definate impact on my life & outlook. When I have this sad feeling I go back to a prayer journal. This is one that I wrote down after my brothers passing. I have a choice of how I will react to life. These are personal words but ones I feel compeled to share:

Father, thank you for helping me to choose you. Where would I be today without you? I don't think I truely want to know. Today you fight for me, carry me, talk & walk with me. Someday I'll bow to you face to face I'll feel your love surround me. Until then my job is to be your solider. May I do well as your servant. Amen.


Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Preplan

In this past week the Wayland Wildcats won, the Michigan Wolverines won and the Detroit Lions won....it was a good football weekend for the Andrews family. The kids are pretty good at getting in the routine this school season. It is a little strange having our eldest in college classes until 10 pm. My how life is changing!

Today Tom and I were on the road before 6 am to head over to Ann Arbor. We met with a team of Radiation Oncologist to discuss the next round. I guess I should back up a minute. We tried to have the U of M in Wyoming MI perform the radiation as it would be a 15 min drive for Tom. However Dr. Forstner stated that his case was a little to complex for their facility to handle, so back to AA we went. As the tumor is in the lower right region of his liver and it is crucial that the correct area is radiated along with the fact that is not immensely clear as to what area to radiate, Tom will have markers inserted in an Outpatient surgery. We hope to have this done next week so that we can proceed with the actual radiation. The following week the radiation will begin. It will be a precise and concentrated and they will use the SBRT treatment again. He will also be injected with the IC-Green die to monitor his liver function. Tom will have a total of 5 treatments and they will be no earlier than a day apart because of the high dose. He will need to use a breathing tube to regulate his breathing during the procedure, this is NOT what Tom is looking forward to. His side effects should be minimal compared to his chemo.

We also took advantage of my day off and met with a funeral specialist @ Kubiak-Cook Funeral Services. Tom and I have wanted to do some pre-planning for years now. I finally made the appointment to do it. Don't read too much into this meeting....but we both walked out thinking that this was a good time to preplan while we are thinking clearly.



Nahum 1:7 "The Lord is good. When trouble comes he is the place to go! And he knows everyone who trust in Him!

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Radiation Treatment Plan

I think that getting ready for school is more work for the parents than it is the student. Orientation and Registration are done on different nights and for also separately for the different schools. Our eldest started at Ferris State University yesterday also.....let the school fun begin!

Tom had his Infusion today. This typically takes a couple of hours along with meeting with his oncologist here in GR and a blood draw. The nurse practitioner was concerned about Tom's calcium but the other blood work results she did not mention. I guess the plethora of prescriptions he received must be doing the trick. Both doctors at U of M and here in GR are concerned about Tom's 23 pound weight loss. He said "this the most effective weight-loss program I've been on" I keep telling him that nobody want his program :)

Dr. Worden's office called today and said that the Tumor Board recommends Radiation treatment on his liver. They have ordered an MRI of the liver for a closer look at the tumor. Tom should be able to have all of this done here at the U of M Cancer Center in Wyoming and we do not have to make multiple trips to AA. Tom will be going back to see Dr. Forstner who will performed his last radiation treatment.

Thanks for the continued support that our family is given. People continue to be so generous to us. We appreciate the gift cards & the words of encouragement. To be truthful this weekend was hard for me. Reality has reared its ugly head and though I know that we will have these ups and downs, it's hard to watch my husband change from the go get'er to the man who has to push himself to get off the couch. Our life has been put into slow motion since Tom has been back on the Chemo. At church this week it was hard for me not to let my tears fall because I wasn't sure if they would stop. However, I know that I was meant to hear the message and thanked God that I made it to church to hear about GRACE. I resolve to keep on "talking" to Him who has the power & grace to do His will!

Nehemiah 9:17 "But you are a God of forgiveness, always ready to pardon, gracious and merciful, slow to become angry, and full of love and mercy"




Wednesday, August 21, 2013

How I Spent My Vacation Day

This is the first time that I have missed a month of updates. There has been so much going on it just too much to write about just one update. I do want to thank those who have been so generous to our family. We had a great vacation in Manistee with the Hursh family, we had a wonderful day on Lake Michigan in "The Evil Woman" The summer has flown by but is now winding down and the kids are all getting ready to start school. Our college bound actually starts this Monday, ready or not.

After 3 months of being on chemo Tom had his first scans and we talked to his doctor today about the results. The lesions in the neck, bones, and lungs all are stable. The liver has some lesions that are stable, some have decreased in size, but their is a lesion that has increased 3 times the size. The doctor went back and doubled checked this to make sure it was not a typo. Dr. Worden would like to present Tom's case before the Tumor Board on Tuesday to talk about the progression. He mentioned that he wanted the Radiation department's input to put together a treatment plan.

Tom's med are getting tweaked again, which may help Tom's fatigue. His Magnesium & Potassium were low and they have told Tom to increase his Thyroid medication which is all due to the effects of his chemo. They also gave him a trial mouthwash to help with the mouth sores. Hopefully this will help in his quality of life.

I will blog again when we get the update on Tuesday. Now it's off to one of Tom's favorite thing in this world, to watch his son play football.

1 Chronicles 23:20 "Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; he will not forsake you."

Sunday, June 30, 2013

Good new ~Bad news

There is good news in this post. The fact that we successfully handled two parties in one weekend and had great weather for both days. I was overwhelmed by the number of people who showed up to the parties and that many of my family members came two days in a row (some had a long drive). Thanks for sharing this time with us. I also wanted to thank the "Mister E" who sent me a book of my favorite author. I love to read Francine Rivers & "The Scarlet Thread" is a wonderful novel that I cherish. We also were able to attend many Graduation Open Houses. Tom has not felt the best and we tried to spend time with family and friends, all in all, he has been a trouper!

Tom started back on his chemo now called Cometriq (formerly know in clinical as XL-184) on June 1st. He gets a monthly call from the Tech. asking him so questions and then it is sent directly to our home in about 2 days. He is taking the prescription before bed which he claims is helping his energy level and to have a better "day" Nights however can be another story. Within the first 2 weeks he started the symptoms once again. He has mouth sores and sores on his hands, feet and head. He also has nausea, shortness of breath, dizziness, and now fainting spells. His appetite has gone down, and that's not saying much from what it was. This time around he says that food looks and smells good, but when he starts to eat it doesn't settle and he quickly looses his appetite. I am not sure if this is better as he continues to try to eat vs not have any appetite. However, we have Protein drinks and Cheerios on hand for many meals. He has lost 10 pounds in the last month but the pasty white has been at bay.

Now for the bad news: Last night we were out celebrating my parents 50th at Ruth's Chris a very upscale restaurant in Grand Rapids. I knew that earlier in the day Tom was not feeling well but he was determined not to miss it. We arrived, took pictures, toasted my parents, ate a wonderful salad and had the towns best filet. Tom said it was all tasting so good! After we were given coffee and waiting for dessert, Tom told me to take a walk with him. We started down the hall and I asked him what was the matter, he said I needed to help him to the Men's room....he started to wobble and hold onto the wall for support. He was loosing control and I couldn't help him. I told him to sit down in the hallway and staff came up to see what the problem was. All I could think was to get him to ER and trying to remember the list of prescriptions he took. We eventually got him back into our room and though he looked 5 sheets whiter than before, he was telling us all the he was ok and that it was passing. He was totally embarrassed at the thought of what that scene must have appeared. He was exhausted and said he felt like he ran a 5 mile marathon. As we drove away Tom said he was sorry. I told him "If you were falling down drunk you could be sorry, don't you dare be sorry for being having cancer and being sick!" Before he crashed in the car ride home he said. "Well, I have made this night memorable". I got him home and put him to bed then I broke down. I received many phone calls from my concerned family and assured him that he was now resting and was ok. I did not sleep much last night. It was like the days when he first got home from surgery almost 6 years ago that I would wake up and make sure he was still breathing.

One thing I know is that though we try to go on with our everyday life, and try to make it normal....things are not like they were precancer. When we take our family outings/vacation his medical book is going with us. Also I determined last night that I need to carry a sheet of paper with his prescriptions and doctor information so that I have it at hand & don't have to try and recall from memory if I'm again in this type of situation. In talking with many people we haven't seen in a while I have heard once again how strong I am. I do not take this glory it is from the one who holds me up (and believe me when I say that we did a lot of talking last night)! I also want to say that others have shared their trials with me and I will always say "We all have our trials they are just telling a little different story" We are not alone in our situation and always have someone who will listen, love, and lean upon in our time need.

Philippians 4:13 "for I can do everything God asks me to with the help of Christ who gives me the strength and power"

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Mile Stones

Tomorrow is a big day for the Andrews. Our eldest will be ending a huge phase in his life & we will be celebrating 12 years of school. A few days after that he will be an adult, where did those 18 years go? This just after Tom and I spent Monday celebrating 24 years of marriage together. Yep, I'm getting sappy with all these mile stones. We continue getting the house ready for the open houses in a few weeks. Ready or not....

Tom and I traveled to Ann Arbor today to talk with the doc about the CT scans Tom had done last week. We were told that Tom has two areas of concern. There was noted two new lesions in the upper right neck and an increase in size of the lesions in his liver. The rest of his scans remained stable, which is better than we predicted going in. In the light of this information the doctor thought Tom should start back on treatment. The question is which one should Tom be on. After a brief discussion it was decided that Tom would start taking Cabozantinib (formerly known as XL-184). He should be able to start Tuesday. He will start on a lower dosage than what he was on in the clinical trial. We will see how Tom tolerates it and if its effective. He can also chose to change to Vandetanib. It is nice to know that Tom has options! He will be monitored monthly by his Oncologist here in GR and will travel every 3 months to AA for tests & results. They also gave Tom another prescription to help with his stomach issues and another for his low Potassium count.

Such a different picture today than 3 years ago when there was nothing FDA approved for Tom's cancer. I am so relieved that Tom also has a Plan B of sorts. It still amazes me that the medical field has made such big advancements in a short time. Tom and I went to this appointment thinking because of Tom's increasing symptoms that we would have a huge jump in the spread of his cancer. Thank God we were both wrong!

John 3:31 "He has come from heaven and is greater than anyone else. I am of the earth, and my understanding is limited to the things of earth"



Tuesday, April 30, 2013

May Madness

Spring has finally come to Michigan....yeah! We have a lot of work to do inside and outside of our house and the days are counting down. In 24 days our eldest will be graduating from high school and we are not yet ready to entertain our guests. In the same weekend that we are having Kyle's open house we are also inviting friends and family to gather for my parents 50th Anniversary. Any two people who can work through 50 years of life side by side deserve much recognition! So Saturday will be Kyle's big day and Sunday will be my parents open house: like it, love it, call us crazy, we will get it done in two days :)

Today Tom met with Dr. VanDerWoude, an Oncologist here in GR. She has been recommended to me from a coworker whose husband is battling cancer and they too have both Dr. Worden & Dr. VanDerWoude for a few years and it has worked well for them. Dr. VanDerWoude talked with Tom about his cancer history & said she is willing to also collaborate with U of M and be here for Tom in what capacity they need from her. Tom is moving his monthly infusion to this office as it has been stated that an Oncologist really should be heading this treatment. She talked with Tom about the risks of the infusion and what they will be looking for. There are serious side effects and some of them will not heal if the symptoms start to show. It's important that this be monitored closely. Tom and I walked out of this office satisfied that we have a good team to care for him.

Tom also pointed out a new lump in his neck that he had not noticed before. Dr. VanDerWoude looked and it but it was determined that we would "wait and see" as Tom has his scans scheduled in May at the U of M which should show the root of this new bump. Tom has his scans on May 15 and then will go over the results with Dr. Worden on the 22nd. Also it will be determined if Tom will start the chemo regimen at that time.

I want to also take a moment to thank all of you for your continued support. Your prayers, words of encouragement, and the fact that I have many shoulders to lean on has meant the world to Tom and myself. I may sound like a broken record every month, but I just want to let you know that IT DOES MATTER! Life is not always easy and I know how helpless it can feel that you can't fix what people are going through. However, things like just hearing that you are praying for my family is huge to me because I know who's ears those precious words fall upon. I know that I am not the only one going through "stuff" and that I too pray for you and your family as we all go through the valley and hills of life. I started a journal where I had a few names written and each morning it would take me a few minutes to pray for a person while they were having a difficult time. This has turned into pages and an all morning event as I get ready and these people come to mind. I know what the power of prayer can do!
God Bless you

Daniel 9:23 "The moment you began praying, a command was given. I am here to tell you what is was, for God loves you very much."